Friday, May 2, 2008

I did not walk in the morning. I made a conscious decision to do something else after I got dressed. I was bothered with the thought, you should walk FIRST, but I didn't.

I did not walk at noon. I made the decision to take care of some business instead.

I spent the afternoon waiting in several different waiting rooms. When I arrived in each new location I asked if I had time to go out and come back. The person at the desk always said, "I don't know. You better just wait." So I didn't go outside and walk.

I stood up and "moved" in one of the waiting rooms. Moving (not walking, just moving) is not a common occurrence for waiting rooms. I suppose it could indicate that a person is not calmly waiting. Perhaps the person is becoming agitated. Perhaps the person has something "suspect" in their large bag (tote bag). Perhaps the person should be monitored. Perhaps security should be alerted that there is someone "moving around" instead of sitting. So I sat back down.

Sitting for five plus hours made me very tired. I was dozing off in my chair in the last waiting room.

Earlier in the day I got hungry. I hadn't planned to be away from home so long and did not bring a snack with me. I made a point of heading to the cafeteria where I ate a bean and cheese burrito. There weren't any vegetables available, no fresh fruit. Lots of "bad choice" items. Soda, candy, chips and sweets are the big sellers. I would've bought a dark chocolate bar if they had one, but they didn't.

By the time I had accomplished all that I had to do (the purpose for all that waiting) I was in a bad place (mentally, emotionally and physically). I decided I was GOING to have an ice cream cone. I'm glad I did not pass a Dairy Queen because I wanted a chocolate dipped cone. I got a cone at McDonald's.

I did not walk in the evening. I rode along with Bob to pick up Julianne. She asked what we were going to have for dinner. I was totally exhausted. Bob stopped at Subway. I did not intend to get a sandwich. I planned to sit in the van. Bob wanted me to come in with them. I shouldn't have. I ordered a sandwich (Philly Cheese Steak) just because it looked good in the picture. I started to eat the sandwich on the way home.

Reflecting:
I didn't walk this morning -- then I felt "guilty" all day about that.
I didn't bring a snack along -- I got too hungry. I procrastinated over some things -- I had to sit and wait all afternoon and was frustrated when things did not go smoothly (consequence of procrastinating). I ate (the ice cream cone)-- instead of downloading my emotions. I ate (the sub sandwich) -- instead of downloading my emotions.

Hindsight is 20/20.

I rode the exercise bike for 20 minutes before I went to bed.

I haven't written in my food diary since Thursday morning ... must take care of that immediately! (another thing I needed to acknoweldge).